On Bubs and Beyond: Being an Endo Mum
By Jessica Taylor and Sammii Walters
At QENDO this Mother’s Day we are celebrating Mums of all varieties: from our own mothers who fought alongside us as we tried desperately to get our diagnoses, to those of us who have become Mums ourselves, sometimes after years of trying. We also celebrate those still on their fertility journeys, those who have lost children, those who have lost their mothers, those Mums growing their families. We see you, this day is for you too. In this blog two of our QENDO team share their perspective on motherhood, getting there, being here, and what the day means to them. Happy Mother’s Day from QENDO.
Jessica Taylor, President
Mum to one sassy toddler, who is quite literally a vibe.
Mother’s day. It means something totally different to each and every person, add some weight to this day if you’re attempting to navigate your way through the fertility labyrinth.
For me, nearly three years after my toddler evacuated from my nether regions, to be honest, I am just starting to enjoy the day. When you look forward to having a child of your own for many, many years, faced with the possibility that it might not happen, you would think, for sure, the day to celebrate being a mother is like the icing on the cake. But for many, including me, it is a reminder of the thousands of women yet to get “here”.
When you are “here” every day is a gift to be celebrated as a mother. Clichéd, I know! “Here” is you navigating the next chapter of your life, amongst the dried shampoo holding your “mum bun” in place, the brown coloured stain that could either be an Easter egg or…..and the absolute rollercoaster that is motherhood.. you finally get a break, that is at 9pm after you’ve put your toddler back into bed for the 67594th time tonight… you do get a chance to sit back, exhausted, and so appreciate that you would not have it any other way. You remember the sassy response from your toddler that made you laugh and remembering how they were able to blow their own bubbles for the first time today. You remember, despite the rollercoaster, it is the best ride of your life.
For me, I am so incredibly grateful to have four generations of women in my life, whom my toddler has an opportunity to know and learn from. We usually spend our Mother’s Days together at our family home laughing and connecting. Mother’s day to me is appreciating the women that have come before me and the generations I am attempting to support and encourage.
I think of you if you are one of those navigating the fertility labyrinth and send all my strength and ability to balance the many factors to get “here”. I hope to see you soon.
Jessica x
Sammii Walters, Gold Coast Volunteer
Mum to one beautiful new Bub, who gave birth in the midst of a pandemic, but is finally celebrating her very first Mothers Day.
With my very first Mother’s Day approaching I’m thinking a lot about how we reached this milestone in our lives. About how, trying to conceive our first baby brought with it my PCOS, Endometriosis and inevitably infertility diagnoses. I personally believe you don’t become a Mother when you hold a baby in your arms. It starts with a dream, a longing for something you create, grow and love unconditionally, through good times and bad. It’s strange to hold so much love and excitement, when you’re also still bitter about the way your baby had to be conceived because your body couldn’t do the one thing it was designed to do.
Although we had to fight hard and work through IVF for our beautiful girl, we would do it all over again just to hold her in our arms. Being a Mama is so much more challenging than I ever expected and of course with the C word (that shall not be named), causing families and friends to miss out on such a crucial milestone in our lives, I am applauding all new parents. I’m exhausted, isolated, anxious and damn proud of everything I have achieved through my journey to motherhood. So, from one Mama to all of those with babies in their arms, in the sky or in their dreams, I wish you a beautiful day full of beauty, hope and above all, love