A Letter To My Younger Self
By Maddie Worth
Dear Maddie,
You’re 13. You’ve just started high school and are going through a lot of changes; starting at a new school, meeting new friends, learning a new sport, and now you’ve got your period.
Your periods are heavy and irregular which can be normal for some but the ‘cramps’ you’re getting aren’t! Cramps that cause the kind of pain that make you feel so faint you barely make it to the sick bay conscious, with the colour washed from your face and vomiting uncontrollably are not normal. Each month you’re taking pain killers (which aren’t helping much) and putting on a brave face, like you think all the other girls do. I think you should make an appointment with your GP to tell them about the pain you’re feeling.
Now you’re 14, in grade 9 at school. Your symptoms haven’t improved, in fact, they’re worse. I’m so glad you are going to see the GP, make sure you ask lots of questions. The GP told you it’s normal to get cramps during your period and gave you the name of some stronger anti-inflammatories as panadol and nurofen isn’t working for you anymore. Your Mum mentions to the GP that your Aunty has endometriosis but they dismissed the comment so you think nothing more of it.
Now you’re 15 and nothing has changed. You have the same symptoms but the pain during your period is sometimes unbearable. Your GP gave you a prescription for the contraceptive pill to help with the pain and regulate your cycle. After taking it for a few months you noticed slightly less pain, it’s not a cure though.
Congratulations, you’ve graduated high school and have been accepted into nursing at university! You’re spending the entire first year of your degree learning about the anatomy and physiology of the human body. There is a small amount of time dedicated to learning about the female reproductive system but endometriosis isn’t something that was even mentioned. Your ‘cramps’ are worse than ever. Severe bloating and abdominal cramps are almost a daily occurrence and not restricted to that time of the month. Maddie, please go and see your GP again, these symptoms aren’t normal and you should ask more questions to get the answers you need. Your body is trying to tell you something isn’t quite right, please, listen to your body.
You’re now 20 years old, you’ve just graduated from university and obtained a position as a perioperative nurse. Moving out of home to live in a new town and starting a new job is a big change for you! You have been so focussed on your job that you’re probably not paying much attention to yourself, which happens, and that’s ok.
You’ve been on the job for a year now. You’ve been involved in lots of surgeries, including laparoscopies to diagnose and excise endometriosis. I’ve been waiting for you to have that ‘lightbulb moment’ while looking after these ladies who are suffering the same symptoms as you.
Maddie, you are the one in 10 that has endometriosis. You need that same surgery, and I wish I could have told you that earlier.
It has taken 9 years for you to realise your symptoms aren’t normal and reach out to a specialist. After 9 years of this pain, you’ve had your first laparoscopy, leaving you with a diagnosis of endometriosis. They found it on multiple organs including your ovaries, fallopian tubes, bladder and bowel. I’m really glad you asked for the test to check on your fertility. Unfortunately the test showed that your ovarian reserve is extremely low, but I think your decision to undergo an IVF cycle to freeze eggs to give you options in the future is really smart! IVF at 22 isn’t something you ever expected, I know, but reality for some who suffer with endometriosis.
You’re so strong, but please don’t continually put up with the pain. You’re body has a way of communicating when things aren’t right. Keep listening to your body and asking the questions you need to advocate for your own health.
Maddie x